God, in His wondrous mercy, did not give us children when we thought we wanted them. No, He waited until we were old and way less energetic. Just kidding. Just old. Ha. Ok. Anyway.
As I have mentioned before, I am rather task oriented. And the older I get, the more I get that way. It may have something to do with the fact that for 17 years my husband and I were alone. Alright, we had a dog, but still. We got married, got jobs, he finished his masters, we got different jobs, we moved 9 times, we bought five houses, we traveled. Together. But alone. We made the best decisions for the two of us.
To be honest, that creates a certain way of life that is hard to shake. What works for us. What do I want to do now. What restaurant should we eat at tonight. What kind of car do we like this year. What activities should we do to fill our free time. To what charities would we like to contribute. I don't know if you noticed, but it's a lot about us. The two of us. For almost 20 years.
Then, we adopted two beautiful children. I was two weeks away from my 35th birthday when I became a first-time parent. I was one week away from my 36th birthday when I became a mom for the second time. For the parents of two biological children, this is hard. But I know women who have had children less than a year apart. It is possible. They have an inkling it's coming, and they might be able to prepare mentally for it better than I did. For me, it was, and is, overwhelming.
I have learned that though I thought I was a good multi-tasker, I really am not. Two children, my control issues, and an era of "ME" have taken a toll on my perceived parenting skills. My frustration level shoots through the roof at minor distractions. When I take a step back, I am selfish and pathetic. I lose my objectivity much earlier than necessary. By a long shot.
But God, in His wisdom, shows me His grace in strange ways. Take, for instance, laundry. I don't know about little boys, but with little girls, laundry does not just double, it exponentially multiplies. Especially when little girls have different outfits for the different parts of their day. Breakfast time, outside time, nap time, TV time, after bath time, and bed time. No. I'm not joking. One night, in the past couple of years, I was doing a load of towels. And I shouted up to my husband, "I just did a load of laundry that was nothing but towels!" At that moment, I was aggravated. HOW much laundry would I be doing in my lifetime if I had to do a load of JUST towels every few days. Really, it's mind-boggling to think about.
And then He reminded me that just a short while ago, I could fit ALL of our laundry in two loads. And I was begging Him for children. And He answered my prayers. And children create laundry. Therefore, laundry, especially a load of JUST towels, was a BLESSING. And to this day, whenever I do a load of JUST towels, I smile, and thank God, and am content in my heart. His kindness to me is overflowing.
11 You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy,
12 that my heart may sing to you and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give you thanks forever.