Friday, September 12, 2014

I'm Not Good Enough

Lately I have had friends that have either gone through really rough, earth shattering times, or amazing and unbelievably miraculous times.  And with either case, the question that always comes to my mind is, "Could that be me?"

I don't honestly know how I would react to a severe health issue.
I would hope I would react graciously and tenaciously.

I don't honestly know how I would react to an amazing blessing.
I would like to think I would be humble and giving.

The people who I know who have been through these things have been awe inspiring.
And I would like to think I would react like they have.

But I don't think I would.

Because my focus would be on me, not my God.  Not in the Giver of the Gift-good or bad.  (But we all know, God doesn't give bad gifts.  Only opportunities to draw close to Him.)

Sometimes I see people that go through trials, and I wonder what they have done wrong to experience that.  Or I blame the brokenness of our human race.  And I pray that I am good enough to avoid the bad stuff.

And then I see these amazing, holy people, being blessed above all measure.  And I think that I am too sinful to receive such blessings.

And so, deliberately, I took all this to my God the other day.  And He gave me clarity of thought.  The kind that lets me know He is the Author of the answer, because my answer is so completely wrong.

He reminded me that blessing or trial, the person's goodness or sinfulness is NOT the reason they have experienced the things they have.  The only reason that person has experienced it is for His Glory.  And for whatever reason, He has chosen that person to bring Glory to Himself.

I have seen sinful people in despair.  And in triumph.
I have seen faithful people in despair.  And in triumph.

I'm not saying He doesn't allow the wicked to be blessed.  Or the faithful to be tried.  Only that regardless of who they are, they will bring Him Glory.

I would love to hear your thoughts.  Respectfully.